Random ramblings to newbie Model Mayhem models from someone who don’t know Jack

Read http://www.newmodels.com twice. The book is available at Amazon. Then read this.

Don’t be an idiot. Remove all email addresses, AIM, MSN, and YM addresses from your profile or you will be bombarded with scam artists who want to do “webcam interviews” with you. You will be asked to get naked and your “interview” will end up on an amateur porn site.
No one will send you random unsolicited job offers to fly you to their State or Country with all expenses paid upfront. You are just not that hot. You need to look in the mirror and be honest with yourself. If you are under 5′ 9″ living in a small market, you will not be offered high paying jobs to do non nude work. What is a high paying job? Any jobs that got your attention. The best way to avoid a scam is to learn how models are hired so you can spot bogus offers. This is how model are NOT hired:

Random offers from people you have never heard of using public emails accounts but claiming to be from an established company.

Prepaid jobs with cashier’s check asking you to wire back money. You are not hot enough to be prepaid and businesses do not do business using Western Union.

Any jobs offering to pay for you to travel from a smaller market to a larger market. Do you really think London has run out of models so they have to hire you from Iowa?

Any promises to get you into any major magazines or model for any designers you recognize.

Now go read this twice and save yourself some money.

Never post any self portraits or mirror pictures in your portfolio. It cost less than $20 and less than one week to get basic shots with a disposable camera. These are four must have basic pictures if you don’t have professional pictures. 1. Headshot-smiling 2. Headshot-not smiling 3. Half body shot in tight fitting clothes 4. Full body shot in a 2 piece swimsuit or swim trunks if male. Use minimal or no makeup with your hair tied back. Do not pose. Do not shoot from above. Stand against a white background outdoors in the shade if possible. Look here for some examples used by Elite.

Models: List your correct stats. If your weight is listed as 10 pounds, I will assume you are fat. If you list your age as 100 years old, I will assume you’re old.
- Bust
  
  Wrap the tape under your armpits and around to the front of the fullest part of your chest. Before recording this measurement, make sure that your arms lowered to your sides. Relax and then record this bust measurement at the natural size.
- Waist- Measure at your natural waist at its slimmest part, which is approximately 2″ above your hip bone.
- Hips
  
  Measure the widest part of your butt. This is usually not the measurement at your hip bone. If you get a measurement under 30″, you probably made a mistake.
There are strict height and size requirements for professional agency models. At minimum, they are 5′ 8″-5′ 9″ for women and 5′ 11-6′ for men depending on the market. Large markets like NY will have stricter requirements while smaller markets like San Francisco will be more lenient. Commercial print models can be a little bit shorter but not by much. At minimum, women need to be 5′ 7″ and men need to be 5′ 11″ for most commercial print work. No, it does not matter that you look taller in heels. No again, you CAN tell how tall someone is in pictures. Check here for more detailed info.
No, you are not a Plus model. You are just overweight. Professional plus models have very strict height and weight requirements. Just because a model is overweight does not mean she is a plus model. A plus model is not a plus size woman. Check here for more info.
I have never seen evidence of a petite modeling agency. They are as elusive as the Lochness monster and Big Foot. There are some agencies in large markets with Petite divisions but there are no agencies specializing in petite models.
Magazines are printed on paper and can be purchased in news stands and bookstores. Websites calling themselves magazines are still just websites. Photographers cannot guarantee you placement in magazines. Magazines cannot guarantee you modeling jobs at Fashion Week. Photographers do not choose who goes on covers of magazines. Editors do that.
There is nothing magical about getting agencies to look at you. Simply go to their website and look up information about their submission process. If you are local to them, you can just show up at open call. There is no need to pay anyone to submit your pictures for you. Photographers cannot get you priority consideration from modeling agencies.
Do not “sign” with any “agencies” who insist you pay big dollars for their photographers and take their modeling lessons to get their modeling certificate. While legitimate agencies will expect you to pay for some upfront cost such as comp cards and photography, you should not be forced to use a the photography services of an agency in which they have a financial interest. Legitimate agencies will give you a list of recommended photographers and you pay the photographer for your portfolio images. It is a common misconception that legitimate agencies will never charge for any of your expenses. Be suspicious of agencies who ask for cash up front to “register” with them or ask for unreasonable amounts to be featured on their website.
Unless you are a signed agency model, do not start any TFP/TFCD shoot without the following documents signed. If you still choose to proceed with shooting without signing a release, understand that the nature of a test or TF* session is to create portfolio images and both model and photographer may still be able to use images from a test session in their portfolio without a signed release depending on State.

A Model release detailing the exact usage permitted by the model of his or her likeness. A model in the United States generally has a stronger position without signing a release.

A Usage agreement from the photographer detailing the exact usage permitted of the images.

A written agreement detailing the terms of the exchange including how many images will be received and in what time frame. This is your best protection against photographers who refuse to give you images after a shoot. This does not need to be a formal contract. It can be as simple as an email exchange documenting the promises and terms made.

Check references thoroughly before you commit to a shoot. Do not limit yourself to just calling the one or two models the photographer has given you. Do a Google search on the photographer’s name or the studio name. Someone claiming to be established should have multiple hits. You can also check the Yellow pages and White pages to make sure name and address information verifies. If the photographer list credits of other models, contact them to get a reference. Checking references is the best way to insure a safe session. If for any reason things don’t check out, don’t be afraid to ask the photographer about it. Mistakes and miscommunication often happen and you should give the photographer an opportunity to explain before canceling a shoot based on a bad reference.
If you meet the requirement of a fashion model and plan to submit pictures to a fashion agency, you DO NOT need professional portfolio pictures. It will more likely hurt you than help you. Do not believe any photographer who tells you that you need an expensive professional portfolio and his connections to get signed by an agency. All you need are basic snap shots like these and show up at open call or submit them online. If possible, submit hard copy photos instead of email images. Hard copies can easily be passed around and will stand out from all the email submissions. For commercial and talent agencies, you may need a book, head shots, or a comp card. Check with the agency first to see what they expect to see. Check the agency’s website and customize the photos you bring to closely match what they use for their models.
Facts about modeling. You inner beauty does not mean jack. It’s your outer beauty that rules. If you were a book, you’d be judged by your cover. Get over it. Confidence, personality, and perseverance are not key to modeling. The key to modeling is height and beauty, and an excellent professional work ethic. The rest are secondary.
Take all positive and negative comments and tags on your pictures and profile with a grain of salt. They are about as important as a construction worker cat calling you from the 5th floor as you walk by. The only opinion that counts is the opinion of those who have ALREADY worked with you and those in a position to hire you.
Don’t be pretentious and try to get something for nothing. Credits are worthless when it comes to paying bills. Photographers: your fake online magazine is not fooling anyone. Your offer of exposure on your cheesy T&A site is worthless.
Nude pictures and T&A shots on your port will get more views and comments. Female models will get more attention than male models. It’s a fact of Model Mayhem. Get over it.
Escorts: Not going to go there. Use the search feature.
Don’t start a newbie thread asking if you have what it takes. If you’re serious about modeling and want to sign with an agency, submit your photos online to a reputable agency or go to open call if you are near an agency. Only the agent can tell you if you have what it takes for them to represent you at that time. Nothing anyone else says count. If you’re doing anything but agency modeling, network and make connections. You will quickly learn if you have what it takes by the number of offers you get. Let the market decide.
Do not, under any circumstances, start a rant thread trying to tell your side of the story about some horrible experience you had. In most cases, these thread will turn against you because 1. you didn’t realize what an idiot you were in the first place or 2. the person you’re bitching about comes into the thread and tell their side of the story making you look like a fool.
Planning a shoot? Print this TFCD/TFP checklist and discuss the terms before committing. You will save yourself a lot of headaches later.

The top women’s modeling agencies in New York are:

The top men’s agencies in NY are:

Some reputable modeling agencies in San Francisco are:

Some reputable modeling agencies in the Los Angeles area are:

How to improve your profile

Stop screaming that you won’t do nudes, so don’t ask. It has no effect at all on those already pestering you and it only serves to alienate those who would consider you seriously. Just say in regular text that you don’t do nudes or implied nudes and ignore any and all emails asking about such work. I get about 100 spam emails a day but I don’t put on the front page of my website “Stop sending me spam!” That would be pointless. As pointless as you screaming “I don’t do nudes so don’t ask!”
Remove all AIM, MSN, and YM addresses from your profile or you will be bombarded with scam artists who want to do “webcam interviews” with you. You will be asked to get naked and your “interview” will end up on an amateur porn site.
Look at this as your resume and a representation of yourself to the world. A higher standard applies compared to everyday conversation and instant messaging talk. Check your spelling and check your grammar. Don’t give the world the impression that you’re stupid, illiterate, or lazy. Keep your Myspace slang for Myspace.
Keep your profile short and concise. Don’t ramble. Include only pertinent information. Before you write it, ask yourself if it’s relevant to your profile. If I have to page down more than twice in your profile, you’ve already lost me along with most other viewers.
Don’t write your profile in the third person. It looks pompous and pretentious and people will laugh at you.
Start with a strong, positive lead in. Don’t start with a negative like “I know I’m fat but…” and don’t start with your schedule. Don’t post warning about bad experiences you’ve had. Don’t trash people who have wronged you. You will come out looking worst that those you trash.
Make it clear why you’re are on Model Mayhem. Is it to become a professional model? Is it to model for fun and money? Is it to get pretty pictures so you can tell your friends you’re a model? Different standards and expectations apply depending on what you expect to get out of this site so state your intentions accordingly. Saying you want to do all types of modeling is counter productive. No one can do all types of modeling, including you.
Be realistic. If you’re 5’ 1”, don’t say you’re going to take over the fashion world as the next runway model. People will just laugh at you. Don’t call yourself a plus size model just because you’re overweight.
Set conditions and expectations based on your body of work. If you’re a professional working model signed with an agency, you can afford to be very picky. If you’re 5’ 1”, 130 pounds, and have camera phone pictures in your portfolio, you can’t afford to demand much.
If your name and location is in the profile, don’t start by stating your name and your location. It’s redundant.
Check your stats. You are not 10 pounds and 99 years old.
If you have a specialty that separates you from the rest, focus on that. Keep in mind there is already very stiff competition in the alternative modeling arena so unless you are really into that scene, you will probably not do well as a poser.
Use the credit section to your advantage to add credibility to your profile. List only things that are significant and impressive. Otherwise, leave it empty. A good rule of thumb is that if you can’t Google it, don’t put it in. If anyone has to page down to finish reading your credits, you’ve lost them. If you are a model and credit Barbizon or John Casablanca’s Modeling School, people will laugh at you. If you are a photographer and list “awards” you paid for, other photographers will laugh at you.
Don’t fake magazine covers or major campaigns with your pictures. It just looks stupid. We know you didn’t model for that D&G or Victoria’s Secret campaign.
If you’re going to lie about your stats, make sure you are consistent in your lies. Check your OMP profile to make sure that extra inch or two you added to your height matches up.
Save you Match.com profile for that site. No one cares what your likes and dislikes are and no one cares that you are a kind, considerate, loyal person who likes kittens and Hello Kitty dolls. We’re looking to book models for a few hours to shoot. We’re not looking for long term relationships. (Ok, I take that back. Some are looking for long term relationships but those are not the photographers you want to meet)
Don’t link to your closed or personal Myspace account, especially if it plays music automatically.
Don’t display nudes or implied nudes in your portfolio if you no longer do nudes or implied nudes. You’re only inviting harassment.
Don’t include more personal information than is absolutely necessary. No one needs to know your class schedule or your birthday.
If you’re a minor, ask your parents to review your profile and portfolio before you post. If you’re a minor, any contract you enter into is not enforceable.

Learn the difference between these words:

Your, you’re (Your is the possessive form of you, you’re is you are)
Whose, who’s (Whose is the possessive form, who’s is who is)
Affect, effect (Affect is a verb as in to cause a response. Effect is a noun meaning ramification)
Accept, except (accept is to receive, except means but or yet)
Whether, weather (Whether is which of the two. Weather is what they report on the news every night)
It’s, its (It’s always stands for It is, its is the possessive form)
I before E except after C unless you’re talking about your weird, feisty, foreign neighbor who seized the opportunity to pull off a heist in the name of seismic science for the good of society.
Their, they’re, there (They’re all pronounced the same but spelled differently. Possessive is “their” and the contraction of “they are” is “they’re.” Everywhere else, it is “there.”)
Alot is not a word. It’s actually two words.
Advise, advice (you advise someone by giving them advice)
Aspiring, expiring (You are more likely to be an aspiring model than an expiring model)
Upcoming, Up & Coming (You are an Up & Coming model. There is no such thing as an upcoming model)
And since I’m at it. Zagat is pronounced zuh-GAT, not ZAY-gat or ZAG-it. Teva is pronounced Teh-vah not Tee-vah.

27 Responses to “Random ramblings to newbie Model Mayhem models from someone who don’t know Jack”

Sunless Tanning - Page 4 - Diesel Bombers Says:
March 27th, 2008 at 2:09 pm
[...] they have a list of photographers that they use and will help keep you away from the weirdos. Random ramblings to newbie Model Mayhem models from someone who don’t know Jack | blog.patyuen.com If you have any more questions just ask!…Register to view all the text in posts its instant. [...]
Random surfer Says:
July 17th, 2008 at 4:27 pm
some good info in a condescending tone.
Just dropping by Says:
August 15th, 2008 at 3:45 am
Excellent information that is useful for to me use. Thank you for taking the time to write it. I appreciate it.
annarandom Says:
September 7th, 2008 at 8:18 am
What a stupid waste of typing you have here. Shorter models and plus size models have just as much work now a days as the skinny crack head looking size zero girls. YES you can be a plus model.To just classify plus girls as “overweight” is ridiculous. Especially when you take a city like New York where modeling is major and the own population of New York has less than 20% of residents actually wearing a size zero. Overall it makes you looks like an idiot and although there are harsh realities in the modeling world its people like you that discourage young potential models just to ensure that you still have a spot on top.
LR Says:
September 11th, 2008 at 3:23 pm
hey annarandom- reread the article. it doesn’t say plus sized models are overweight- it says that all overweight chicks aren’t plus sized models. huge difference. now you look like the idiot.
Shon D. Says:
September 17th, 2008 at 7:27 am
AnnaRandom? Bitch please.
Bill Passer Says:
September 18th, 2008 at 4:26 pm
Hobbiest Photog here. Thanks for this, appreciated muchly. Nice to have this sort of info for myself and my models.
Nina Modi Says:
October 29th, 2008 at 10:57 am
“I before E except after C unless you’re talking about your weird, feisty, foreign neighbor who seized the opportunity to pull off a heist in the name of seismic science for the good of society.”

This is the funniest thing that I have read all day…

Peace man, you are cool, ignore the negativity, we know that you are trying to help models…

XOXO,

Nina
sakura Says:
November 8th, 2008 at 12:04 pm
This is quit interesting but what about people who want to do creative modeling instead of fashion modeling? I want to be an alternative model and do themes such as gothic horror, gothic Lolita and fair-tale themes. Mostly when people think of modeling they think of fashion industry. I actually tried Model Mayhem but they denied me. I wish they tell me why instead of telling me to figure it out myself. I did show a full body shot and a head shot that shows myself clearly but still I don’t know why the deny me. But still at the same time I found them accepting poor quality models who take pictures with their camera phone and even with a mirror shot and they said no mirror shot. And don’t get me started about the camera phone half naked shot. This is what I don’t get, why they accepted them and not someone who wants to be creative and have fun with costumes. I know it’s not my looks because I actually look better than some of the models they have especially the model who use pikura photo booth pictures. That one is just plain weird, stupid and cheap because it’s like $3 a set of sticker photos with a bunch of random junk like bubbles, stars, crowns and ribbon that you can add on you picture. What was model mayhem was thinking? And they can’t say it was because they change their standard on their website because these so call models are all recent members. Maybe they would like me better if I show myself half naked in a bikini just like over half of the members they have on their site.
Michal Says:
November 20th, 2008 at 10:23 pm
This post is informative and fun, despite the condescending tone. My condolences to annarandom and her misinformed view of modeling.
Excellent post!
sarah Says:
December 21st, 2008 at 1:45 pm
How you know when a gencies likes you
jenny Says:
December 21st, 2008 at 2:02 pm
Site owner edit: I deleted Jenny’s comment because I don’t like to pollute my blog with people who speak retard with misspellings and run on sentences. It sets a bad example for the children.

Jenny can repost after she gets her G.E.D.
Melanie Says:
January 6th, 2009 at 7:55 am
Love the post…so glad that you took your time to make sure that models aren’t naive to the modelling world. I saved it so that I can use it as a guide in whatever I do. I’m new and I’m not really out there yet, but I definitely want to be and become a professional model very soon!! Thanks again

Mel
Joel Says:
January 9th, 2009 at 4:28 pm
Great tips! The tone may not be as subtle as others wish to have but it’s always the straight talk that sinks through the soul. I’ll take this as good advice from a good adviser. Did I get that one right?
GINGER CURRY Says:
January 19th, 2009 at 1:21 pm
LOVED THE WAY YOU CUT TO THE CHASE,AND JUST STATE THE COMMON SENSE FACTS.FUN,HELPFUL,AND MOTIVATING.IM BRAND NEW TO THE COMPUTER WORLD,2 MNTHS NOW.BUT 28 YRS IN FITNESS,LITTLE LATE IN THE DAY FOR BOTH,BUT I HAVE A KILLER FIT BODY STILL.48,AND STILL TEACH A HARDCORE KICKBOXING CLASS,AND BOSU.I WOULD LIKE TO BECOME A FITNESS MODEL,BUT AM NOT SURE WHICH IS THE BEST PLACE TO START.PLUS I DONT KNOW HOW TO DOWNLOAD PHOTOS YET.I NEED ADDRESSES TO SEND A COUPLE OF SHOTS,BUT HARD TO FIND SO FAR ON THE FEW SITES IVE LOOKED AT. MAYBE SOME IDEAS THERE? FIT,OR FASHION YOUR ADVISE COVERS IT ALL THANKS,GINGER
Melissa Says:
January 24th, 2009 at 10:25 am
So am I correct in assuming Model Mayhem is no good? My daughter was “approached” and given a card with a, pardon my speech, but slutty looking girl doing a mirror shot. I thought from the first few words my daughter spoke this was a sham/porn/escort kinda thing. Anyone know if my assumptions are correct? Also, daughter not looking to model. She was just at a carwash when approached. and was flattered.
Arturo Cantu Says:
January 26th, 2009 at 6:19 am
This blog is awesome!
Would you mind if I referred new models here?
Arturo Cantu Says:
February 2nd, 2009 at 11:41 am
“Don’t be an idiot” LOL awesome way to start the blog! lol
Can I refer newbies to this place?
Rhonda Says:
March 8th, 2009 at 5:50 pm
This was very helpful - thanks
Huntergirl Says:
March 9th, 2009 at 4:10 pm
There are definitely some attributes to this post - though the tone was pretty hardcore…lol
On another note, I wanted to mention that Glamour Modeling is a great option for women who aren’t very slim or taller than 5′7 but more curvy (in all the right places) and somewhat toned. You don’t have to model naked as well(!) - implied nudity is great, as well as the sensuality the model brings to the camera. Artistically, there are many fantastic photographers choosing to hire more “voluptuous” bodies than those of the very thin version for their projects. Model Mayhem has a plethora of glamour models that work constantly - I know because I am one of them!
Love and light,
MzH
Blue Sanchez Says:
March 11th, 2009 at 10:10 am
Hey there, I find this post so very helpful.. LoL

By the way, I’m just 5′6″, is there still a chance for me to become a model?? I’m still a young guy, I’m still on my teens, are there any tips for me to get taller or what??

LoL… send me your answers to:

blue_sanchez2003@yahoo.com

thanks!!
Tamia Says:
March 13th, 2009 at 10:05 pm
Annarandom - go back to annarandomland.

Melissa - that “slutty” girl is also somebody’s daughter - likely who had the misfortune of a terrible makeup artist and a sleazy photographer. Don’t rag on the girl just because she’s on the card…there’s every likelihood that she’s not affiliated with the photographer at all and just got scammed herself because she didn’t have a careful parent like yourself.

I’ve scouted models all over the place. Without being there, it’s difficult to be certain either way. I always tell girls though, that a parent or friend is welcome to attend, as long as they mind their manners and don’t disrupt the creative flow. i.e. No hockey moms who talk so large I have half a mind to hand them my camera just to prove why I’m the photographer, please and thanks.
LUFFA Says:
March 25th, 2009 at 10:55 am
This thread was extremely helpful,honest and to the POINT. I am a MM model; I have made some of the mistakes mentioned above and I will certainly adhere to the advice given. CHANGE is good and knowledge is POWER!!!
KaylleeS Says:
April 1st, 2009 at 1:59 pm
If you are not 5′9 “you’re just not that hot”? What a crock of shit. There are many models on mayhem who are 5′4-5′8 that get paying jobs and I have seen, although rare, people who are represented when they do not fit the height requirement. Mayhem isn’t all about the “fashion model” it is about modelling in general and there is many different genres. Since when does being 5′9 or taller make you hot…you can be extremely unattractive and be tall and thin. What about a beautiful face or a perfectly fit body? I do agree that you will not be flown all over the world and the advise about pictures and measurements etc. is accurate but I think that modelling can have a wider scope.
Sara Says:
April 4th, 2009 at 4:19 pm
This was very awesome to read!!! I also really like the comment on Ms.Jenny…lol. Peace,Love, and….maybe not sooo much Chicken Grease.lol.
DeLarone Says:
May 18th, 2009 at 6:21 pm
This really does cover all the bases!!!
Pretty good stuff!

I would like to add that it seems that ModelMayhem has created a culture of its own. So many young girls that are in their prime can get a profile with a few self-shots, find some pedestrian horny photographer to shoot them. Maybe they use a few basic lighting techniques and get a few decent shots. PRESTO!! All the sudden they are “MODELS” and they know everything…lol
Same thing can apply for
young, buff, fit dudes and vast
collective of gay
(not there is anything wrong with that)
photographers.

Are they “models”…technically yes!
Will anything ever become of it….probably not.
LindaHuynh Says:
May 25th, 2009 at 10:10 pm
Hahaha awesome blog here you’ve got. I love it, its funny and so helpful