Internet modeling decoder ring for newbies

For models:

  • Freelance modeling agent, FHM, Glamour magazine, Marie Clarie magazine, Nylon magazine, Complex magazine, will be in your area, prepay, forward payment, bless you, have a blessed day, urgent job = Nigerian scam
  • Contact me on AIM, YM, MSN = Nigerian scam, webcam porn, hooker offers, I want to say nasty things to you without leaving evidence.
  • $ X,XXX.00 offer = Porn
  • $ X,XXX.00 offer plus travel = Hookers
  • I am a model and would like to recommend this photographer = I am a photographer contacting you through my fake model profile.
  • Webcam interview = I want to masturbate while watching you strip and film it for amateur porn sites.
  • How far will you go to make it in this industry? = Can I masturbate and come on you?
  • Can I partner with you? = I want to get naked and rub up against you while I take self portraits.
  • I have won multiple international photography awards = I have bought multiple international photography awards to compensate for my suckiness and I have a small wiener.
  • Life story on profile = Wannabe artist or no credits/experience.
  • Life story on profile + “my models” = White knight
  • Life story on profile + “my models” + insist models bring escorts = Incestuous child molesting white knight from Florida on the lam awaiting trial.
  • List of well known clients and publications but no tear sheets = Liar
  • I prefer to get to know my models before shooting = I need a date bad.
  • You get a call at 11 pm from the photographer asking how your day was = You have a stalker.
  • You cannot call me in the evenings = My wife does not know I’m shooting naked girls.
  • Railroad tracks/caution tape/rose pedals/lollipops = Not one original bone in that body.
  • Port full of industrial settings = Art school drop out.
  • Model for my magazine = I own Microsoft Paint and I want you to model for my Myspace page.
  • The clock = Run for your life!