The Mayhem List: Whambulance topics

Brought to you by talentless hacks who think pointless whining about others will some how make them better

whambulance Brought to you by talentless hacks who think pointless whining about others will somehow make them better.

  1. Model has no experience but only wants paid work.
  2. Model has nudes in portfolio but says she won’t shoot nudes.
  3. I’m not charging but someone else I want to work with is charging.
  4. A model flaked on me for the tenth time and no I don’t have a phone number.
  5. Why won’t you let me bring an escort? It’s for my safety. I suspect you will rape me but I still want to shoot with you.
  6. Why won’t you model for me without an escort? I cannot be a true artist unless I’m alone with a model. In fact, my best work are self portraits. The model is just a distraction.
  7. I sent out unsolicited email and they had the nerve not to reply saying no thanks!
  8. Other people doing TF shoots is killing me. Everyone needs to stop doing it.
  9. Other photographers are giving out all photos. They need to stop doing it.
  10. Model will do TF for clothed shots but wants to be paid for nudes. Damn it, she must get naked for free or else she is a stripper. Everyone knows all artists do it for free. That’s why I never charge a model to get naked for me, because I’m a true artist.
  11. I had this great original idea of posing a model wearing caution tape on railroad tracks and some other hack stole the idea from me!
  12. Why do tall models get all the jobs? I can work it better those those thin sticks. Besides, I’m 6 inches taller with 6 inch heels.
  13. Why won’t models do more TF? I need more practice and they need more experience.
  14. I’m not paying you. You should be paying me.
  15. Model said: “Why do they let so many bad photographers with no talent and crappy images on here?”
  16. Photographers said: “Why do they let so many ugly wannabe models with dirty mirror Myspace shots in here?”
  17. Why don’t photographers credit all models? I really want to stalk that model and you’re making it hard for me to track her down.
  18. Someone was mean to me! I’m picking up my toys and leaving. I mean it. I really am leaving. But before I leave, I want to announce it to all of you to let you know I’m leaving. Don’t anyone try to stop me. Really, I’m not trying to get attention. Don’t try to stop me. I’m really serious. I really am leaving. And did I say I’m taking all my toys with me and that I’m leaving? Yes, it’s true. You heard it right. I will no longer be here. In other words, I’m leaving. As in not here anymore. Like going away….with all my toys.(PS: I’ll leave my profile up for anyone who wants to contact me but I am technically leaving.)